you should be so lucky

Recently someone close to me inclined their head in the direction of my son and said “I don’t envy you that’s a lifetime of care”
And for a moment I took such offense it almost blinded me to the truth.
Each morning I wake up and typically the eyes of my son are on me and when I open mine he breaks into a huge grin reserved for me. Imagin waking up like that.
I spend my day in the company of a remarkably resilient baby boy who continues to restore my faith in hope and gives me strength I didn’t know I had because he has strength I didn’t know existed.
He grins at the nurses that poke him and smiles for the doctor that cuts him and babbles away while the scary stuff is happening. Who can say they could do the same.
I go to sleep most nights with his head beside mine. His contented sigh in my ears, a dribble of milk on his chin and all that he taught me that day running thru my mind.
My children look for kids like him and smile delightedly when we come across someone who is a part of this new “family” we are in.
We are richer wider deeper closer because of him… and we are only a few toes into the water.
In my crazy inexperience here’s what I think…
You should envy me. You wish you were me, you should be so lucky. Cuz this is a lifetime of care and love and smiles. Boo yeah.

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